I thought toilet training the third time around was going to be a cakewalk. And since the first two human beings I had to toilet train were boys, I figured that with a girl it would be easy.
Renee showed signs of being ready quite early on. She was thrilled when I got her a princess toilet seat. Yes, I know I said I'd never cave to the boy/girl stereotypes, but she picked the toilet seat out, and if she was happy to pee on a princess, I was happy to oblige.
We took the family to Disneyland in April. We left Renee behind. And before you think I am the meanest mommy in the universe, I'll have you know that Renee was spoiled ROTTEN by grandparents while we were away. AND my mom had her almost potty trained. I was thrilled. I don't know what she was bribed with, but whatever it was it worked. Until a couple of weeks ago when I royally 'effed things up.
I was in the bathroom trying to fix my hair, and Renee wandered in telling me that she had to pee on her princess toilet. Just as those words escaped her tiny little mouth she discovered a spider lurking on the wall. She had a little two year old freak out and asked me to "put the 'pider outside NOW". Most days I have a thing about killing spiders, I just don't do it. I'll catch them and put them outside. But on this particular day, I was in a rush, and when a two year old has to pee, you'd better get to it right now. So I grabbed the spider and without thinking, put it IN THE TOILET. Renee freaked. And screamed. And freaked a little more. And refused to park her ass anywhere near a pink princess or a castle that was within 10 feet of a toilet.
I think she'll be in diapers until she is 10. Shit.